Terms and Words Editors At The Huffington Post Need To Google Before Pressing “Publish”

Jennifer Coolidge, aka "Stiffler's Mom" helped introduce the world to the term "MILF".

Jennifer Coolidge, aka “Stiffler’s Mom” helped introduce the world to the term “MILF”.

The Huffington Post has published a recent article titled “Words Women Are Tired Of Hearing”.  The article (which should be titled “Words That Women Who Write For The Huffington Post Are Tired Of Hearing”) starts off with the sentence: “Every now and then we come across words that grind our gears.”  By “we”, I assume they mean women, since that is what the title says.  Apparently, The Huffington Post had a conference where every woman on the planet voted unanimously on 25 words they were all tired of hearing.  Either that or one or several writers at the Huffington Post decided that since they had vaginas, that qualified them to speak on behalf of all women and dictate to women who don’t agree with them on what words they tired of using (even if they aren’t).  The problem is that no woman can speak on behalf of all women (though, as is the case with most articles, the title says something different than the content as it is later clarified that these are words that women at the Huffington Post are tired of).  It is also a problem in that many of the terms are terms that women actually commonly use and embrace themselves.  Another problem is that some of the terms are simply terms that accurately describe the behaviour of some women, in which case, it seems that the author or authors of the article have misplaced their frustration, directing them at the words when they should be addressing the behaviour of the select women who have created a need for such terms.

 

I think the term "baby bump" was actually coined after John Hurt's famous scene in "Alien".

I think the term “baby bump” was actually coined after John Hurt‘s famous scene in “Alien“.

On a side note, not that I mean to argue semantics, but the “words” The Huffington Post address are not actually “words” in many instances, but rather phrases, and there are actually 26 difference “phrases” or “words” (I will refer to them as ‘terms’).  Their count is 25 because they mistakenly lump “MILF” in with “cougar” as if the two words mean the same thing; they totally don’t.  A MILF is simply a mother that the speaker wants to have intercourse with.  So long as the woman in question is a mother, the term can be applied to girls as young as 16.  The term MILF also does not imply a mutual sexual interest at all.  The term cougar is used for an older women who actively pursues sexual relations with much younger men.  Please Huffington Post, do your research!   The Huffington post has also described these terms as words that they hear “everyday”.  If the author or authors of this article hear these words every day, then they visit a LOT of porn sites, in which case, they need to stop visiting porn sites if the terms upset them so much.  And for the record, most the terms are NOT terms I hear every day.  Some I haven’t EVER heard and others I haven’t heard since highschool, or since the last time I watched American Pie.  That said, let’s move onto the list of 26 terms which the Huffington Post has no clue about.

 

 

Kim Karhashian helped popularize AND sexualize the term "baby bump".

Kim Karhashian helped popularize AND sexualize the term “baby bump”.

BABY BUMP:  This is not a term men throw around with a passion.  When I see the word “baby bump” it is usually used on a celebrity rag of some sort.  On social networking sites, I haven’t seen any of my male friends using the word, but rather, I see women using it.  Women who post pictures, often times taken by professional photographers, showing off what they call their ‘baby bump’.  Their female friends are usually eager to use the term as well when complimenting the mother-to-be.  The Huffington Post, though, claims women are “tired of hearing” this term.  Perhaps some are, but it seems that this group of people are either an underwhelming minority, or a staunchly silent majority.  That said.  What is wrong with the word?

 

TEASE:  The Huffington post says that just because somebody is not interested in you doesn’t make them a tease, it makes them ‘not interested in you’.  Really?  Well, for the record, when properly applied, the term ‘tease’ is not used for somebody who doesn’t express an interest; it is used for somebody who feigns interest, often for attention or free drinks, and then doesn’t follow through.  As a young man, a lesson that is important to learn early is: Just because she wants you to like her, doesn’t mean she likes you.  If the women at the Huffington Post are tired of hearing this word, they need to start talking to the women out there who ply their wiles with aim of getting free drinks.  When large numbers of women stop feigning interest, men will top using the term tease.  It is that simple.

 

From "baby bumps" to "lady lumps".

From “baby bumps” to “lady lumps”.

LADY LUMPS:  The only person I’ve heard use this term IS a woman.  I do not know any men who refer to breasts as “lady lumps”.  That was Fergie.  And that was like a decade ago.  If you are tired hearing it, take the song off of your Ipod or simply change the CD in your car.  Trust me.  The radio isn’t even playing this song any more.  On a side note, Alanis Morisette does a great cover of that song.

 

PLUS SIZE:  I’m sick of this phrase myself, but again, this is not a word that typical men use.  I see many women using this term, female models embracing this term and applying it to themselves, and the men that do use it are usually in the fashion industry.  Do you really think the typical man is that into fashion that he knows Crystal Renn is considered a “plus size” model?  I agree, the term should be dropped (I write about it here), but if women are tired of hearing it, then they should stop using it.

Gia Genevieve would be considered a 'plus size' model by most, but the term is misleading because she is compared to women who are emaciated.

Gia Genevieve would be considered a ‘plus size’ model by most, but the term is misleading because she is compared to women who are emaciated.

MOMPRENEUR:  Tired of hearing this word?  This is the first time I ever heard it!  The Huffington Post is claiming to be tired of hearing word it is actually introducing to its audience!  Well, they claim that mothers who are entrepreneurs don’t need their own special word, but isn’t that what language does?  Create words that have specific meanings?  The terms implies that the entrepreneur in questions is doubly commendable because they are capable of handling parenting duties and maintaining the entrepreneurial spirit at the same time.  If women want to use this term, I don’t see a problem with it.  I don’t know any men who are using it.

 

BUTTAFACE:  Firstly, the term is butterface, and secondly, it’s typically only used by crude men.  If women are tired of hearing it, chances are they need to re-evaluate the company they keep.  If one hangs out with men who use this term, and you don’t like hearing it, you should likely stop hanging out with such men.  If you are being exposed to terms like this at work, I suggest taking it the Human Resource department and letting them give the asshole using it a refresher in workplace harassment.  As for me, this is the first time I’ve heard this word not coming out of the mouth of a teenage boy or obnoxious drunk at a bar.  That said, it may be common on porn sites.  If women out there are visiting porn sites that use this word and they don’t appreciate it, I suggest boycotting the site.  Let your economic power push this phrase out of the vernacular.

Sometimes the term "buttaface" applies (usually when appleid to "face swaps"), but it is usually used by drunken assholes or adolescent boys. If the ladies at the Huffington Post hear it on a daily basis, then need to re-evaluate the company they keep.

Sometimes the term “buttaface” applies (usually when appleid to “face swaps”), but it is usually used by drunken assholes or adolescent boys. If the ladies at the Huffington Post hear it on a daily basis, then need to re-evaluate the company they keep.

WIFEY:  Ok… if you hear this word a lot, you are probably listening to a lot of hip-hop.  If you like hip-hop, but hate this word, you are going to have to make a choice.  Suck it up, or end your relationship with hip-hop.  I’m not sure what else to tell you.  I don’t remember hearing this word and not hearing the person using it also drop gratuitous amounts of obscenities that also include the word “bitch” and the a certain racial slur that starts with the letter “N”.  If you are listening to people like this, and don’t like the language they are using, again, I suggest boycotting such artists.  Let your economic authority expel this word from our vocabulary as well.

 

If girls don't like to be called girls, then girls should stop making shows about girls called 'Girls".

If girls don’t like to be called girls, then girls should stop making shows about girls called ‘Girls“.

ADDING “FEMALE”:  Um… what is wrong with adding “female”?  I don’t normally see the word “female” added unless it is in an article speaking to gender issues, in which case it is kind of needed.  Are there cases where “female” is being added in conversations where gender issues aren’t being discussed?  I haven’t read any such articles.

 

BIOLOGICAL CLOCK:  Again.  If women are tired of hearing this one, they should stop using it.  I don’t know a lot of guys who drop the “biological clock” phrase in conversation.  Most men treat it like a swear word.  There are just a few things most men learn not to discuss with women.  The first two being a woman’s weight and her age.

 

If you don't want me to use the term 'side boob', then please tell me what term I am suppose to use to describe this?

If you don’t want me to use the term ‘side boob’, then please tell me what term I am suppose to use to describe this?

GIRLS:  I agree, using the term “girls” to describe women is problematic, but at the same time, the adult women I have been in committed relationships with have always introduced me as their “boyfriend” and seem to get upset if I introduce them as my “lover” or “ladyfriend”.  So please, let us know what term we are supposed to use if “girlfriend” isn’t making you upset.

 

SIDEBOOB:  If you don’t like hearing the word “sideboob”, or other equally childish words, you should likely stop visiting porn sites and gossip sites, because honestly, if you expect the ‘writers’ who put up the content for these sites together to use appropriate terms, then you are visiting the wrong sites.  Either embrace your guilty pleasures, or stop reading celebrity rags.  Don’t complain about them.  That just gets tiring.  Also, “TOPBOOS” is not even a term.  We use “cleavage” when describing that, and I will not stop using that word ever.

 

YUMMY MUMMY:  Who even uses this?  Never even heard this before.

 

Courtney Cox, star of Cougar Town.

Courteney Cox, star of Cougar Town.

MILF:  If you don’t want to hear this word, stop visiting the BangBros website, or take American Pie out of your DVD player.  I know it’s funny, but how many times do you have to watch it?  Problem solved.

 

COUGAR:  If you are tired of this word, don’t watch, don’t watch documentaries on jungle cats on Animal Planet and Discovery, or stop watching Cougartown, visiting porn sites that have “cougar” in the title of the domain, or hanging out with women that calls themselves cougars.  Yes, there are men who use this term, but all you need to do is stop talking to these men.  If they are co-workers, that is what the Human Resource department is for.  Yes, you should even have to go to the Human Resource department, but sadly there are socially inept people, from both sexes, that can be found in every work place.  I’m starting to get the impression that the Human Resource department at The Huffington Post is not doing a very good job.

 

 

The word "gold digger" will fall out of use when women stop marrying men for their money.

The word “gold digger” will fall out of use when women stop marrying men for their money.

GOLD DIGGER:  If the women at the Huffington Post are tired of hearing this term, then they need to talk to women who chase after men for their money.  Once women stop chasing after men with money, the term will fall out of use.  I promise.  Of course, you may have to explain the values of dating a man with a bus pass over dating a man with a BMW.  Good luck with that.

 

CAMEL TOE:  Seriously?  Just don’t visit porn sites with the terms ‘camel toe’ in the title.  Problem solved.  You are welcome.  Also… some girls wear spandex/yoga pants that are so tight that you can see the shape of their vaginal lips.  Sometimes, you can even see their pulse.  I mean, what are we supposed to say when we see that?  Something needs to be said!  We need a word to describe this when we are relating the narrative to friends.

 

The term "exotic", much to the dismay of the folks at the Huffington Post does not simple mean "not white". In some context white people can be exotic, but skin colour doesn't define it alone, it depends on dress and presentation and other things.

The term “exotic”, much to the dismay of the folks at the Huffington Post does not simple mean “not white”. In some context white people can be exotic, but skin colour doesn’t define it alone, it depends on dress and presentation and other things.

PMSING:  Yes, obnoxious men do use this term, but whenever I see the term “PMSING” on a facebook status, it is a woman describing herself.

 

LEAN IN:  Again.  I have never even heard this term.  Thank you Huffington Post, for introducing me to a term you then tell me not to use.

 

EXOTIC:  What is wrong with this one again?  It fits in certain contexts, and it is not used in a ‘finger pointing manner’ by most people, it is used as a compliment.  As for using it to describe a woman whose ‘not white’, I’m not sure that is accurate.  White women visiting the East can be referred to as ‘exotic’ as well.  It is all about context.  And simply being “not white” doesn’t make one exotic.  There are more nuances to it than that.  Check the OED next time you write about a word.

 

Some women like the term "diva", such as DivaAkasha.

Some women like the term “diva”, such as Diva Akasha.

DIVA:  Again, I hear women pronounce themselves as divas more often than I hear men call women divas.  I’m not sure what men can do about that.  If women at the Huffington Post are tired of hearing the word, then they should talk to the women who use it.

 

FASHIONISTA:  If you don’t like hearing this word, stop watching fashion shows and reading fashion magazines.  If you like fashion, then I’m not sure why you don’t like this word?

 

MAN HATER:  If you want to see this term fall out of use, either teach the men who use it to use the word misandrist instead, or convince the women who hate men to stop hating men and then the word will fall out of use.  Believe it or not, there are unreasonable women who claim to be feminist and then exclude a disgusting about of sexist attitudes toward men and actually do hate men.  Read some feminist manifestos.  You’ll see.

 

Booty call? Well... some women use that term, even if the ladies at the Huffington Post don't. Who are they to prescribe their views on sex.

Booty call? Well… some women use that term, even if the ladies at the Huffington Post don’t. Who are they to prescribe their views on sex.  And yes, this is a gratuitous shot of a woman meant to antagonize the authors at the Huffington Post.

BOOTY CALL:  Booty call?  Another word that women use a LOT.  If the folks at the Huffington Post think women are tired of this word, they need to talk to the women who use it and see if they can find some middle ground. Once they do that, then we can start talking to the men who use the term.  Getting them to stop should be easy.  Just convince women who have casual-sex arrangements with a male friend to stop having casual sex and the term will fall out of use.

 

LADY BITS:   If you are tired of hearing this, stop talking about sex in front of toddlers with adults who feel the need to use such euphemisms.    Seriously though, who uses this term?  Isn’t “pussy” or “cunt” more offensive than “lady bits”?  What term should we use instead?  “Vagina”?  “Vag”?  “Va-Jay-Jay”? I need some direction here.

 

SOCCER MOM:  Some mom’s have kids who play soccer and they take an active role in their children’s extracurricular activities.  Seriously? Now it just sounds like these folks at the Huffington Post are just being difficult and bitter.

 

FOOD BABY:  What does this even mean?  Again another term that I have never heard.  Dear Huffington Post: If you want people to not use the phrase “food baby”, then don’t introduce your readers to the phrase “food baby”.

 

Rambler About Rambler

Jason John Horn is a writer and critic who recently completed his Master's in English Literature at the University of Windsor. He has composed a play, a novella and a number of short stories and satirical essays.

Comments

  1. Very nice an sexy pics

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